Renaissance Woman|Entrepreneur|Author|Speaker|Mentor|Dreamer|Unconventional Free Spirit who helps people find themselves.

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What does sex mean to you?

  • Posted on
What does sex mean to you?


Ah, sex. For me, sex is all about all sorts of things. For others, it may mean something totally different. That is why it is important to talk about it. When is the last time you discussed sex with you parter, or even your one night stand? I know this is a taboo subject (which I absolutely love talking about) but it really shouldn't be. We are all sexual creatures and meant to express ourselves comfortably, freely, and with vulnerability. This is why it is important to have self respect before engaging in such activities. Then, respect for your partner. When is the last time you got tested for STD's? That means being safe, use protection. I don't know anyone who loves a condom, but I also don't know anyone who loves their STD. Maybe I'm wrong. 

But once you have respect on both sides, and integrity, then take off your clothes (with intention, please) and dive in! Well, it depends. Sometimes you might just rip each other's clothes off and fuck your brains out. High five! Other times, you might need a build up. And build up is a good thing. Actually, it is a great thing. Take your time people and explore. It can be fun and pleasurable and can last for hours. It's not about the destination, it's the journey. Foreplay is for FUN! Do you remember what it was like when you were a teenager? The first kiss, the unbuttoning of their shirt, the hand that slides down your thigh, the fingers that stroke, well, you get the idea. 

Hopefully you are confident in yourself to know what you want if you are single. Just cause you have sex does not mean that you need to get into a relationship with this person. So many people make this mistake. If you have a connection with someone and want to explore that, take it to a physical level, great. But don't run away like a little girl or boy after the deed is done. Spend some time talking or share a meal together afterwards. Or if it's just about pleasure then thank them for their time and respectfully depart. It doesn't have to be weird or uncomfortable. The only thing that does make it that is not talking about things. There is nothing wrong with casual sex.

Maybe you have found someone and are in a relationship. That is wonderful! Kudos to you for being able to share part of you life experience with someone. It is hard to find someone who you are compatible with and who gets you. But when you do, that is an awesome feeling. And that is that little thing called love. When you are in love, sex is that much more fun and enjoyable. Well, it should be, and can be, but you may have to work at it if you have been with someone for a while. Spice it up, roll play, wear something sexy, get some toys, and most importantly, go on dates. Every week. Make your partner a priority, but make sure you are always doing your part to take care of yourself first. If you've lost that loving feeling, I can help you get it back.

However, if you and your soul mate have made it to the end of your journey, I can also help you consciously uncouple. Don't throw away or damage the relationship that you had with your loved one. Get out before it goes there. One person or both may need to recognize that the relationship is no longer serving you. That is when it is time to part ways. I am a dreamer and totally believe in a happily ever after, but I also know that everything is not always meant to last. That is when it is time to let go gracefully and release the other person so both of you can live the life you were meant to. Don't waste your time in an unhealthy partnership. Carpe diem.


Does any of this resonate with you? If so, and you need someone to discuss it with, consider reaching out to me. Chess stands for creative, healthy, explorative, safe sexuality. Here is a safe place to share your desires, experiences, and fears. This appointment is specific to those that want to express themselves verbally to discuss all things sensual and sexual and dealing with relationships (with yourself or others) as well as the mind, body, and soul. This can also be done for conscious couples who want to reconnect or couples who want to consciously uncouple.


Did you know that wearing a fragrance can enhance many aspects of your life? I always say when you look good, you feel good, but scent matches that philosophy as well. It makes you feel good, confident in who you are. It is another way to describe your personality. It's that last thing you do before you walk out the door before an evening out on town. Have you ever walked by someone on the street and smelled their scent? It's intriguing and it keeps you guessing. It also turns you on, that's why it is important to wear a fragrance that reflects you to attract others to you. By doing such a thing, you will draw someone to you with your intoxicating scent, one that also evokes the most memories. And who doesn't want to have a memorable encounter with another, especially in the bedroom (or wherever you choose to engage each other). Fragrances smell different on different people, so it's important for you to find one that compliments you and your lifestyle. Over the years, many people complimented my signature fragrance, and that is why I had it made into SEX. I also created LUST and CUFF, all of which are unisex fragrances. Even this morning someone asked what I was wearing. It's a good conversation starter. (Just like clothes.)